10 Useless Pieces of Information About Me.

1. My signature coffee is a vanilla latte on skim milk.





2. I have a stationery obsession. Nothing excites me more than a good notebook, matching pen and coloured tabs in a folder.





3. I am a visual/ kinaesthetic learner- meaning to take things in and remember them I have to write or draw them – Visual to remember the image or notes and kinaesthetic meaning I remember by the movement of writing it down.





4. I write lists. Then I collate lists and write a list of all the lists I have.





5. My first car was a 1978 Mazda 323. When I drove along the keys used to fall out of the ignition and if I tried to turn a corner the steering lock would come on. This made for many fits of laughter in my uni days and kept my speed to 40 kilometres an hour.





6. I play the piano, but I don’t have one in my home. Our family piano is at my mums. If I go somewhere where there is a piano I sometimes pour out my soul into a long sonata and then feel fully cleansed and ready to face the world again!





7. I met my husband when I was assaulted by a gang of 10 juvenile criminals on a Sunday afternoon in the main street of town. He was my blue eyed policeman who came to the rescue. I believe that we were destined to cross paths. I have learnt through this that my greatest blessings come from my greatest adversities.





8. When I am nervous I say the most ridiculous things. It started when I was bitten by a bee at the town pool in Scone where I lived when I was eleven. I had to tell the manager because I was starting to swell up. He was a cranky man who said “ where did the bee bite you?” I replied “ up the deep end” He screamed “where did it actually bit you?” I cried and said “ on the second step on the ladder up the deep end” He screamed “DID IT BITE YOUR ARM, DID IT BITE YOUR LEG?” between tears I had a bit of a chuckle and showed him my finger!





9. For about eight years I was a school teacher. Now I see young men and women around town who remember me and say “ you taught me in 3rd class”. I go to the mirror and check my wrinkles. Surely I haven’t changed at all in the last 14 years.




10. When I was pregnant the first time my other Nanna who died in 1999 told me “when that child is placed in your arms you will feel a love like you have never known before” It is my single handed duty to tell this quote to every pregnant woman I come across.

Are You Fun To Live With ?

Poster from allposters.com



I was at an event recently where the keynote speaker opened her address with this question. It nearly knocked me off my seat.



Are you fun to live with ?



It really got me thinking. Am I fun to live with ? What would my family say about me if they answered the question honestly? If my husband was interviewed without me present, what would he say about me ?



I am asking you to ponder the question about yourself. Are you fun to live with ? Are you easy going, reliable ? Do you speak to your family respectfully? Do you model behaviour to your children that when they mimic it back to you they get into trouble for being cheeky and disrespectful?




Or, do you save your best manners and behaviours for strangers – because let’s face it, you don’t want people to think you’re rude and not like you ! Why do we serve up our worst behaviour for those that we love the most?



How can you be more fun to live with?

The Perfect Father's Day Meal*

Last Friday my favourite radio programme Life Matters ( ABC Radio National) ran a programme on the topic of the decline of eating at the table. This is a topic I have read about in the past. I can recall reading some research that came out of the USA that suggested that kids from families that ate at least four meals together a week had better school grades, fewer teen pregnancies and limited drug use. My sons are only seven and ten but I can guarantee you that eating at the dining table as a family will prevent either of them falling pregnant in their early teen years. LOL

The photos are of the table that my sons set for the father’s day meal. I cooked a lamb roast with so much rosemary that when I first put it in the whole house smelt like the Catholic Church from my childhood! LOL ( must have been a sort of incense smell).

We eat 99.97% of our meals at our kitchen table. We have a small cottage style house and the table is slap bang in the middle of the kitchen. It seems to be the ‘hub’ of the house and I believe it when people say ‘the kitchen is the heart of the home’.

I believe that eating at the family table has a myriad of benefits for our family, probably some that I am not even aware of and could probably never articulate, but these are some thought that come to mind.

1) It is a TIME OF GATHERING – we are all busy and it seems as the boys get older, that pace continues to increase. Meal times are an opportunity to gather together as a family unit.

2) It is a time to COMMUNICATE – we have a similar conversation each night at the table. It usually starts with ‘ what was the best thing about your day ?’ or ‘How was Miss Taylor (teacher) today ?’ Even when they were tiny they loved to contribute their five cents about something that happened that day. Even if it was a couple of disjointed words at the age of 18 months, it was still their contribution.
 As they have gotten older their contribution has become increasingly articulate and I love how they recount narratives about their day. It makes me laugh that the ten year old’s contribution usually involves some funny anecdote about the day, about who said what that made the whole class laugh. The seven year old’s contribution usually starts with ‘ do you know what?’ and we all have to say ‘what??’ to which he replies ‘well……’ with terrific expression in his voice! Even the grown ups have to contribute what was good about their day. It often makes us think. When I am in an awful mood, it is the conversation that usually turns me around! I am hoping that as the boys get older a platform is built for open communication and sharing of concerns and issues.

3) A time WITHOUT TELEVISION. Even if the television has been on I always turn it off when we sit down to eat. I seems that the meal time is a special time. The switching off is like some great ceremonious gong that announces ‘ let the sharing begin’.

4) A time of STRUCTURED MEALS – combined with a menu plan it is a great way of looking at what the kids are eating. I have one son that eats absolutely anything and another that eats very blandly – rice chicken pasta peas saos apples and rice crackers could get him through the year. Laying meals out on the table lets me keep up with what we eat.

5) It makes me feel a bit WALTONISH – lol. Remember the show THE WALTONS? I have the compete Series One on DVD and I love it. It’s kind of strange and hard to articulate but I love the old fashioned values, the simplicity of life, the hard times, the family values and I love that they sit around the table and debrief over beautiful home cooked meals.

I know that as the boys get older and get cars, mates, girlfriends, part time jobs and hormones that this romantic notion of the family meal will probably go out the window so for now… for this season I will enjoy it while it lasts.

I ask you this………. Are you swapping the opportunity for better family relationships, a stronger family unit and greater communication for the evening news and gossip or the latest soap opera ?? Food for thought I guess………

10 Weeks Into This Frugal Lifestyle

10 weeks since I made the Mental and Emotional Seachange Style Eccentric Decision or (M.E.S.S.E.D) to throw in my job and head metaphorically to the beach. I’m doing surprisingly better than I thought I would. I was frightened that my “chase the joy in life” phase may be just a passing mood. I was fully ready to accept the fact that I may get bored and head back to work. But, no….. the great social experiment continues and {shock, horror} the joy factor remains. Can it be that the joy from simple living is ongoing? Will I continue to experience the joy ? I’ll keep you posted!

What has changed so far in my simple, joy-filled lifestyle? Many of these changes have been implemented over the past few years, but NEVER have they had so much importance.

Before, sure, I would cook when the spirit was with me, but now I HAVE to cook so the children have something to eat when they get home from school. I HAVE to bake bread because otherwise we won’t have any ( …logical!......) I HAVE to grow veggies because we live 16 hours drive from the nearest store and the plane with supplies only comes once a month. Okay, that last statement may be stretching it a little, but my point is that I really enjoy doing these things and I love the fact that there is a degree of importance and reliance on these tasks being done.

I have noticed that the weather has become a MAJOR discussion point in our lives. We had always joked that in the older generation weather was the topic of choice in any given situation. Days were heralded as good or bad depending on the temperature, time the sun rose, whether there was a slight breeze and what time the sun started to go down. Sometimes there was much discussion about the link between the weather and the drying of the clothes. You know, “I had to get the washing out early because you have to get it in by two because it starts to get cold again’. Then there was “ I put the washing out by 7 and it was dry by 8”
Now Hubbie and I are becoming 1940s pensioners who are obsessed with the weather. We look outside and say “ good dryin’ day honey” or “this rain will be good for the radishes”. It makes me laugh because suddenly, there is such a connection with mother nature and the all important weather.

Since the M.E.S.S.E.D I have realized how important it is to have SKILLS. I have great skills in some areas but am completely lacking in others. This is a problem throughout my generation. Our mums burnt their bras and went to work, which was good in so many ways, but there was no-one with apron springs strings left that we could hang onto and learn by osmosis all the things that are required to be frugal and self sufficient. I am really regretting that I didn’t pay more attention to Sister Mary Martin during my sewing classes in year seven. If only I knew that I would really need those skills one day. At least she was able to teach me one thing – how to sew a good apron, and to date, that is the only REAL success I have had with sewing. Last week however, I did hand sew a felt pocket for my son’s IPOD and {God love the gorgeous child} at the age of ten…. he REALLY loved it. I will have to sew him some more felt features before he grows out of this phase and is too embarrassed to be seen with me in public!

There has been a major break through on the coffee front. As you may recall, one of my greatest concerns about commencing this social experiment was whether or not I would be able to continue to enjoy my signature coffee, a vanilla latte on skim. Last month when visiting friends in Sydney I noted that they were producing a mighty fine home brewed coffee. I had virtually decided that I would have to get a machine at home ( there I was trying to keep up with them and their surname isn’t even Jones). When I got home I remembered that about five years ago I got a free coffee machine when I subscribed to Family Circle magazine. ( Imagine how good it must have been) At the time I had a bit of a go, but couldn’t really work it and I put it in a cupboard in the shed and slowly spread all the attachments around the house. ( you know how you have that drawer in the office that has three dead batteries, two rubber bands, a deflated old balloon and the internal cup off the old coffee machine). So I made the decision that before I looked for one I would try this one out. After some searching through the drawers I found all the pieces and, with the help of some vanilla syrup I am now pumping out a pretty smooth, fair trade, organic, vanilla latte on skim. It’s as good as my favourite independently owned coffee shop in town, but…… added to the joy factor involved…… it’s a close second!

And so continues the journey to a more simple, frugal life. One step in front of the other, three steps forward, two steps back.

A Weekend of Memories

I am very excited to be heading off to my annual scrapbooking camp today. Three lovely days at Camp Elim on the lake near Forster NSW. It is the one time of the year when I can catch up on my albums. I don't scrapbook like you see in the shops with all the piles of ribbon and flowers and sticks and anything else that can be found, to me it is more like a photographic journal. The important thing for me is capturing the story that goes with the photos, like a diary of our daily pursuits with photographs.

I do this in 'hard copy' because although everything is in digital format, the format changes every couple of years. As an example of this I look at my childhood which is on 8mm silent film. The projector doesn't work properly anymore and yes I could probably get it fixed and convert the films to DVD etc etc, but the format will change again before too long. Just think - we started with the 5 1/4 inch floppy disk and then moved to the 3.5 inch disk and then the CD and then the DVD - what will be next ? Realistically I will have to convert my photos into a new format about every 5 years or so.

So for me, it's the old fashioned way. I take photos and I get them printed then I put them into museum quality albums and write with archival inks and preserve them. In the future there will be no outdated technology required to view my history, just the naked eye.

I have all my photos sorted and printed into groups ready to go for my intensive album making session. I have made notes to trigger my memory about what I want to record on the pages and it will be head down tail up working hard all weekend.

Making albums brings me so much joy. For each of my boys I have written an album 'to' them. It is a series of letters and photographs starting with when they were growing in my tummy. It captures how I felt about the day they were born, bringing them home for the first time, when they took their first steps. They love to look at them and read them. It is my view that it reinforces in them how they fit into the family and how precious and loved they are. In our busy lives do we ever take the time to write a note to someone and tell them how precious they are in our lives ?

This is my chance to record history for my family.

The Spirit of My Ancestors

This is the spoon I use to cook with.

It belonged to my great grandmother.

Considering that my Grandmother is now 101 years old, it is amazing to think that HER mother used it to cook with.

If you look closely you will see that one side is worn down from use over the years.

This is one of my most prized possessions. A couple of years ago I was a guest speaker at the View Club and took my spoon along to talk about the importance of writing down our stories. I accidentally left it on the table and it was collected with all the cutlery at the end of the meal. I went home without it and it took a couple of days for me to remember that I must have left it there. I was devastated and returned to the venue and raided drawers and drawers of cutlery with the owners to finally get it back! It must have gone into the dishwasher with every thing else. I was extremely lucky!

I really LOVE my spoon because every time I pull it out I am reminded of the spirit of my ancestors. Hard working, frugal living, self sufficient, simple people. Whether it was by choice or necessity, the spoon reminds me to live like it's 1940s. To be more family oriented. To cook from scratch. To be self reliant. To waste less. To save more. To have a grateful spirit.

I wonder what possessions of mine are going to be around for more than 100 years ? The answer that pops into my mind is unfortunately the millions of plastic bags I have used so far LOL !

There's More To Life Than Money ?

There’s more to life than money. We hear that saying all the time but for many people money is at the centre of their existence and I believe, rightly so.

If you are thirsty and dehydrated you can think of nothing but water. If you are starving you can think of nothing but food. So it is right to think that when you are out of money or you have money troubles then that is all you can think of.

Poor money management creates tremendous stress. There is stress because of guilty feelings of over spending. There is stress not knowing how bills will be paid for. There is stress in knowing that you are going backwards. This stress is often the basis of many disputes and marriage break ups.

The only way out is to WAKE UP from the CONSUMER NIGHTMARE.

If you are unhappy with your present financial circumstances then you must make changes to your relationship with money or things will not improve or they will get worse.

1. WORK OUT WHERE YOU ARE FINANCIALLY – list everything you have and everything you owe. A total clean sweep – right down to that 10c on your bedside table and the 20c coin in the glove box of your car. Gather it all up and FACE YOUR FINANCIAL TRUTH.

2. LOOK AT WHAT YOU HAVE – If you are in debt, look around your home and ask yourself ‘was it worth it’. I remember seeing a TV programme once where a finance expert was in someone’s home and they opened up the storage cupboard and just started counting - $30, $25, $75 etc as they were pointing to board games, hairdryers, DVD collections, toys etc. How much of your money is just sitting around in cupboards. It’s a VERY scary thought.

3. THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU NOW DON’T HAVE: Think about this- if you have a mortgage and you haven’t paid it off in ten years, ask yourself where that money went that could have been used for extra repayments. The answer is – thrown out! You have spent thousands of dollars that could have got you out of debt on things that you have bought and thrown away. How many clothes do you have that are more than 5 years old ? We buy them then they go out of fashion and we throw them away. We also buy popcorn makers and electric slippers, music CDs, storage baskets, doona covers, computers, TVs, lounge suites. We have them for a while and then they become old, boring and unfashionable…. So we buy new ones. So instead of now being debt free, we accidentally spent the money that we could have put towards extra repayments on …… things that we thought were good at the time.

4. KNOW THE TRICKS OF THE TRADE: Advertising is seduction. The sooner you understand this, the better you and your money will get on together. Don’t believe what you see. No face cream will make you look younger, no car will improve your life, no office furniture will increase your income. What will really make you feel great is being financially free, having positive relationships and finding your ‘JOY FACTOR’ – that is, something that truly gives you joy in life. Think about why companies offer - BUY NOW PAY LATER type deals. It is because they know that the majority of people don’t pay on time and they will make extra profits.

5. IF YOU HAVE A POOR TRACK RECORD, DON’T TRUST YOURSELF: I have heard people say, I can’t carry cash because I just spend it. In my experience it is a lot harder to part with cash knowing that you only have $30 in your wallet than it is to hand over your credit card and convince yourself that this is a justifiable one off purchase that you will definitely pay off at the end of the month. BE REAL – carry cash and be creative about not using it.

6.BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF: We get into trouble with money because we are lying to ourselves. We won’t accept the cold hard truth that we cannot live our current lifestyle on our current income. It’s as simple as that. If we were HONEST we would think differently about how we spend.

7. RECOGNISE THAT RECREATIONAL BUYING GIVES A SHORT TERM BUZZ: - Sure, it’s exciting when you bring something home from the shops but the buzz wears off, sometimes too quickly and you have to buy something else to get that sense of excitement. – If it were any other substance you were abusing it would be called a drug addiction !

8. START IMAGINING A BETTER WORLD Day dream about what your life would be like if you were debt free. Would it mean that you could take holidays, real, soul renewing holidays. Would it mean that one of the parents could ‘come home’. Would it mean that both parents could work part time. Would it mean that you could stop working to pay for debt and start working in an area that you are passionate about that may mean a lesser salary. Would it mean that you could leave work all together and work for yourself, create your own income or do volunteer work ?

9. WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO TRADE YOUR TIME FOR: If you are working to create income, then everything you buy you have worked for. If your hourly rate is $30 then to buy a $60 pair of jeans you have to work two hours. You may be quite willing to do that. Ask yourself, however, whether you are willing to pay for other things – Are you prepared to work 20 hours per year to pay for cleaning products that you simply pour down the toilet or the sink ? If not, use vinegar and bi-carb. Are you willing to work 26 hours a year to pay for a subscription TV service that you miss most of the time anyway. If not, borrow DVDs from your local library. What about working 40 hours just to pay for the finance charges on your credit card which are in addition to working to pay for the things that you purchased that created the finance and interest charges. Maybe the answer to some of these questions might be ‘yes’ but it’s worth asking the question.

10. PLUG THE HOLES AUDIT: Go through all your bank statements, receipts, bills etc and see where your money goes. Don’t dismiss any small amounts. If you seriously want to make some changes then plug the holes in your ship. The small holes draining away your potential savings could sink your ship. Look at every option and try to work about how to save $5 here and there. You might find cheaper house insurance that cuts $10 a month off your bill, what about grocery savings by menu planning and shopping with a list, what about using cash only when you’re out. How about driving less or changing brands of deodorant, bread or internet provider. There are THOUSANDS of hints and tips waiting for you out there when you are ready to make the change.

THE RESULTS: Having your family budget under control means that you have freedom. You can sleep at night without financial stress. You can spend freely, knowing that you have amounts in spending categories already there in your money tin when needed. If the kids have an excursion, need new shoes, are going to a birthday party or are playing sport, you can be confident that there is money to cover it. You know that planning your meals and squeezing your grocery budget is worth it for the end of year holiday that you have each year. When you have the money aspect of your life under control it frees you up to think about chasing your joy and living a more sustainable, family centered life.

Feel the Rhythm.....

Can you believe I have made ten Chinese Lanterns tonight because the boys wanted to "celebrate the Olympics"? Personally, I am not into the Olympics - there's that whole Human Rights issue that spoils it a bit for me, along with the whole - money for entertainment while millions starve, but, I keep that to myself ! LOL

It is so lovely to be home for the afternoon/evening routine. When I was working and would come home late I would REALLY miss this, even though I have the best husband in the world that would do homework, cook tea and bath the children, I always felt that I was missing out.

Kids thrive on rhythm and so do adults. It provides stability and security. Life seems to run smoother with a daily, weekly, seasonal and yearly rhythm. That's the way nature operates.

Today confirmed for me that I have made the right decision in leaving my legal career and choosing my family instead. It's really funny that most mothers agonise over the career/family decision when the children are small. It seems funny that I was home for 5 years when they were young then went back to work for about 2.5 years then made the decision to 'come home'. I remember my sister, who has children a lot older than mine, was talking about mothers 'coming home' when the children where in their later teen years, especially when they were in the senior school years because that's when they were needed most. At the time of hearing this I was dreading the idea because you tend to think that as they get older they become less reliant on you. As my children grow I realise that the reliance remains, it is just in a different format.

Another wise woman told me once that there are seasons in life. This is my season to nurture. I don't know how long it will last, but when I feel ready I will return to work. I have a really great boss who sent me an email today updating me on one of our cases and telling me to let him know when I get bored ! lol.......... We'll see when the season changes.

This is What 101 Years of Simple Living Looks Like....

This is my Grandmother who turned 101 on the 15th July. She still walks around, has a wonderful memory and she certainly has " all her marbles". She lived in her own home up until 6 weeks before her 100th birthday.

When the local Newspaper were interviewing her they asked her what the secret of a long life is.

She said it was 'keeping busy'. I guess that is true. I have never known Nanna to procrastinate over anything. She was always prepared for anything. Her freezer was always stocked with freshly blanched vegetables and she had frozen meals she had made bursting out of the huge chest freezer she had. We always joked that if the Apocalypse came, it would be okay, because Nanna's freezer could feed all the survivors! LOL

When asked if she made a wish on her birthday she said she didn't need to make a wish because she had everything she wants and needs. She enjoys living in the nursing home because she doesn't have to do her own washing, cleaning and ironing. She views it as a luxury.

When asked about society today, she said the children are little brats. Her thoughts are that children should be put to work early for their parents so that they learn to do the right thing.

She was asked if she had ever used a computer, and told the journalist that although she had used my lap top, the only mouse she has ever known is the one you set a trap for !

So.... 'keeping busy' is the key to a long and lovely life ? What was she busy with ? In the earlier days it was milking, baking, cooking meals, washing, cleaning, gardening, ironing, farming, knitting, sewing. Then, when she moved to town it was ......... baking, cooking meals, gardening, washing, cleaning, knitting, sewing....... hmmmmmm I guess she was just too busy to grow old.

So, what can I learn from this ? Am I doing my best in the areas listed above? Am I seduced by the advertising devil that tells me to slacken off, rest because I 'deserve it', buy because I 'deserve' it and think about myself because, after all, I am the most important person in the world! No.......... I think I will adopt the more humble life. I will work hard for the joy and peace that comes in knowing that I am 'ahead' and prepared for the days to come.

Proverbs 31:21

When it snows, she has no fear for her household;

for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

We Apologise for The Break In Programming.....

The past two months have been a huge transition time in my life and in our house.


I have decided that I will leave my paid employment and come home. The reason it is such a huge transition is this. I used to be a teacher. While I was off work on maternity leave I did a law degree and in October 2005 I began working for a large law firm. I was admitted as a solicitor in 2006.


Working as a lawyer is really a great profession, despite what stereotyping may tell you. I worked in an area of law that really helped people in crisis. The best thing about helping them was that it didn't cost them anything. I enjoyed this because I enjoy helping people. I get a real 'buzz' from empowering others.


Over the last couple of years I had been questioning my priorities. Making money is a very good thing, as it gives you choices. But making money doesn't do it for me. It sounds like such a cliché but money doesn't necessarily bring me happiness. The lack of money ( and I have been there too) gives me anxiety where as the middle ground brings me joy. The problem with making good money in a job is that you constantly trade your time for the money. Throughout my life it always seems a shift between having lots of money and no time or having lots of time and no money. So I have been on a quest for the middle ground. What if I could design my life the way I want to. After all, nothing is permanent. If I make the wrong decision I can go back, can't I ? There are thousands of sheets of notepaper laying around this house with lists. When the going gets tough, the tough make lists! Lists of pros lists of cons, lists of values, lists of qualities, lists of strengths, lists of weaknesses, lists of assets and lists of liabilities. Lists of goals, aims,objectives. Not that I am into astrology but apparently I am the typical Libran- weighing it up all the time.



Then on the 19th of April I got a call to say that a friend from work had lost her husband all of a sudden. This was a lady who is a real role model to me. She has two children about 18 and 21 and they were a very close and loving family. I looked at her son and hoped that I would be able to raise my sons to be fine young men as well. There she was in her mid 40s - a widow. She had lost her beautiful husband so suddenly. As I sat at the funeral I realised that life is as delicate as a butterfly's wings. It clings to us like a fine spider web that is gone in a breath of wind. Yet we treat it like it is permanent, like it is set in stone, that somehow it is our right to have it for as long as we demand. Truth is, it can be blown away with any breath of wind like a dandelion seed.


With this new found perspective I listed on yet another list what really brought me joy and how I really wanted to design my life and how I really want to raise my children. It always comes back to the way of the old days. How did they afford to live ? Of course they didn't have many of the 'luxuries' that we call every day items, but human needs have not changed at all in the last 50 years. We still need water, food, shelter and love. The only thing that has changed is our unquenchable need for items introduced to us via advertising. We buy because we have a need to fulfill. The items fill that need for short period but then we need something else to fill the void. What is the void we are trying to fill ? We needs in our human psyche are not being met ? The great philosopher Epicurus surmised that we need friends, freedom and an analysed life, that is, to discuss the philosophy of life with friends, while sharing good food. I think I tend to agree with him.


So... once I made the decision there was no turning back. Suddenly there arose a further list of very important things. A To-Do-List of the mammoth proportions. Firstly, secure food. As I have always thought, my Grandmother would never have had only some parsley and coriander in the garden and told the kids to get in the car and take them to McDonalds! Of course there was no McDonalds and no car ! LOL


It was just taken for granted that there would be things to eat in the garden. So..... we built more garden beds and started studying up on when to plant and when to harvest etc. At the moment, there is not much to show for our efforts because it is winter, but the seeds are sown for a wonderful spring.


I have been doing quite a bit of reading. I have stated many times before that no matter what perspective an article is written from it always adds up to the same conclusion to me. Whether it is about green living, peak oil, permaculture, frugal living, voluntary simplicity etc etc it always comes back to living like it's 1940. So I will take on many things from the past whilst keeping the treasures of our modern society.


Only my closest friends can truly understand my reason for living my career, that is, "that I have an overwhelming need to till the earth while my children are young" LOL ! I am sure that many will believe that I have had some sort of breakdown. If you remember the very first episode of "The Good Life" you will be laughing now I am sure.


I guess this means it is time to put my money ( or lack of it) where my mouth is and commence the experiment. Can a thoroughly modern mum live freely in a modern world. Can she produce food? Can she cook from scratch? Can she knit socks(gulp!)? Can she raise chooks for eggs? Can she learn to sew properly (gulp!) and........ can she still afford to buy the occasional vanilla latte on skim milk that has become her signature coffee ?


I believe that my user name "BusyWoman" is about to become an extremely accurate assessment of the days to come. I look forward to it with a sick sense of excitement. I hope you will stick around for the journey.

My Kermit Moment.

Who’d a thought a Muppet character from the 80s would be espousing such wisdom for generations to come.

Today, I had to agree with Kermit, it’s not easy being green!

We have had atrocious weather, as I said yesterday. My grand plan of having a week to ‘get ahead’ has been somewhat wasted. Today I ventured to town with two kids in tow to go to the second hand shop to get three things – a clothes horse, a torch and ( funnily enough) an umbrella. Previously I had watched ‘THE STORY OF STUFF’. You MUST go to the website and view this short film. I cannot begin to describe the impact it will have on you.

Anyway, at the second hand shop, after the children wanting everything from golf clubs to food vending machines ( so they have to pay for snacks, he tells me ! ) I ask the lady if they have any torches or umbrellas. I wanted an old sturdy torch that was unfashionable but solid. Something that will last another forty years because it’s already been around for 35years. The lady said “ no, we don’t have any. The best place to get them from is THE WAREHOUSE. They’re really cheap”. I said to her, “yes, but I want something old and sturdy because I am sick of buying $2 rubbish” She said “ no sorry and Big W is the best place for umbrellas – they’ve got heaps and they’re really cheap too” – “thank you” I smiled and walked out sighing.

Then I venture to the shops and am very proud of myself for picking up just two apples and putting them in my envirobag, and two carrots and two potatoes – all without plastic bags. I need worstershire sauce and I am happy that the bottle is glass. I buy butter and it’s wrapped in paper and I have a green halo glowing. Then I gt around into the next aisle and rice crackers are on a really good special and I stock up ! bummer – 3 plastics packages ! So I think ‘what the hell’ and grab a packet of salt n vinegar chips on the way out! LOL – MUST TRY HARDER !

The Paradox of Our Age by The 14th Dalai Lama

We have bigger houses but smaller families;

More conveniences, but less time;

We have more degrees, but less sense;

More knowledge, but less judgment;

More experts, but more problems;

More medicines, but less healthiness;

We've been all the way to the moon and back,

but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbour.

We build more computers to hold more information to produce more copies than ever but have less communication.

We have become long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are times of fast foods but slow digestion;

Tall men but short character;

Steep profits but shallow relationships.

It's a time when there is much in the window, but nothing in the room.

*Thanks to 'Greening Gavin' for posting this on his site.

Debtland....warning Soapbox moment.

Last night the ABC screened a programme on Four Corners about the debt crisis and focused on one family in the outer suburbs of Sydney who were losing their house. You can see the programme by visiting www.abc.net.au/fourcorners.

The wife in the story spoke about how they had huge debts because the banks 'let them'. Credit counsellors spoke of people in good jobs visiting charities for food because they had 'maxed out' their credit cards and couldn't keep up with their mortgage payments.

Am I heartless for thinking ' as you sow, so you reap' ? I noticed that the house that was being repossessed was far from your three bedroom, one bathroom style of place. It was huge ! Whatever happened to starting out small with a cardboard box under a piece of material for the coffee table? Or having hand me down furniture for some time ? Why do you have to have the huge stylish house the moment you are married. There is not much scope to move if interest rates go up or the wife falls pregnant and can't contribute to the mortgage repayments. But are the banks to blame ? That's like saying McDonalds is to blame for our obesity because they say 'do you want fries with that' and we respond 'yes'. Where is the self responsibility and self accountability ?

We live in a small cottage style house. We have been renovating it for over 11 years now! LOL Well... what I mean, is that the house changes as our family grows. We have taken out walls, closed in verandas, built on to the back of it. It expands as we do. Sometimes I think it will be lovely to move to a bigger, newer, place. When I think about it though it's mostly for the land space, not necessarily the size of the house.

The one thing that keeps me here is that we own it. We finished our mortgage and it's ours. That allows me to sleep at night. I am not trapped in a job I hate because of mortgage payments. I am not worried by interest rate rises.

Our house is not much in some people's books. We could 'afford' a much better home and could, if we wanted to spend our savings, have the 5 acres out of town. But at the end of the day, this is the home where my children were born. It holds our family memories. It is the place that I am so happy to return to when I get home from work. I don't need to impress anyone with my wealth or make out that I am richer than I appear. I don't feel inclined to keep up with the Jones'.

I blame television and advertising for a lot of what is wrong with our lives today. I call it the 'marketing devil'. From advertisers there is a constant message - "go on, you deserve it !" ( said with satanical voice) " you work hard, you know you need it" " think about yourself". etc

It began in the 1950s when they started telling women that they had more 'important' things to do than be stuck in the kitchen, cooking meals for the family! Things have gone down hill rapidly from there until we are told ' buy now, don't worry about paying, you deserve it, pay it back in four years time, you work hard, you deserve it, you want it, you need it, GO ON, life is short" unfortunately for some, life at 28% interest is somewhat longer than they had envisaged!

Anyway....... I'll get down off the soap box now. Epicurus, the Greek philosopher thought that we were after three main things in life...... Good food, Good friends and an analysed free life. When we see advertising portraying a group of people escaping for the weekend in a brand new car, we actually want the friendships and freedom, so we buy the car. Have a look at these elements in advertising and you will soon be a wake up to their ploy . We buy products when what we really want is the lifestyle that goes with them. If you limit yours and your children's exposure to advertising, you don't get bombarded with that feeling that you are missing out, or can't keep up or are inadequate and need to fix the problem.

I stand by my position that if it wasn't for credit cards and mortgage redraw facilities we would be in a 1930s style depression. How would you and your family go if you had to work off cash only. Could you do it ? I find it works for us... and most of all it brings tremendous peace !

Let me know what you think.

Restoring The Vision Splendid

I have been doing a lot of reading lately on a number of topics - green living, frugality, additive free eating etc. I have said this before...... whichever way you turn it comes back to the same thing for me..... live like it's 1940.

Here's what I mean. If you decide that you are going to approach things from a green living perspective then you might group your trips to town to save petrol, shorten your showers to save water and money, save electricity, grow your own food, buy non processed foods, buy foods with limited packaging, buy second hand, not use disposables etc

If you are approaching life from a frugal perspective you will cook from scratch, work on a 'cash only' budget, make things instead of buying them, not spend money on non-essentials, barter or share with friends etc

Whenever I read these ideas for living I think that it all comes back to how people lived in 1930 or 1940. It seems that they had things pretty well worked out!

My Grandmother built a house in 1936 which was made with solid concrete using sand from the creek. There were two water tanks at the back of house, for rainwater or water from the well on creek bank when there was no rain. There was a well which was spring fed and crystal clear. My mum tells me it tasted better than bottled water. There was a big tank that was put up in the 1950s. It was for watering the garden and was filled from the well

All vegies were home grown as were the fruit trees and grape vines. All excess fruit and veg were preserved and made into jam and pickles.

A sheep was killed about once a week or maybe a fortnight for meat. Beef was shared with the neighbours. They also had ham and bacon which was salted and smoked in a square tank with sawdust. There was also chooks for meat and eggs

In so far as rubbish is concerned, nothing left the property. All scraps went to pigs and dogs. All packaging that was re used. My mum tells me that there was also newspaper in the dunnie!!!!

So... in today's terms you would call it ' self sufficiency', 'green living' 'frugality' 'the Good life' etc. I call it 1940s.

I think we can all learn something from this way of life.

Outnumbered

A wise women told me last month that she was going to an Iron Maiden concert because she was spending some quality time with her 18 year old son and nephew on 'their terms' and was meeting them 'where they are at'. I really admired her for this. It reminded me of another wise woman at work who has raised two beautiful children to adulthood and has remained 'connected' with them by taking an interest in their interests ( no matter how awful the music is !)

To cut a long story short, we are off to the football this weekend to see Newcastle Knights play Manly Sea Eagles. I have NEVER been to the football. I haven't watched a game of football since about 1981 when Mick Cronin played centre for Parramatta ( I can hear NSW people my age laughing !) I have this sense that this weekend is an indication of the future. Me as the only female in the family, immersed into 'boy things' over the next few years. I am not overly feminine so it's not as if I am wishing for shopping trips and beauty parlours, it's just that I didn't imagine that I would be 'meeting them where they are at ' so soon. I am actually looking forward to the game - even though I disagree with the commercialism and the 'worship' of sports stars and would much rather my sons worship scientists or peace activists. I am actually smiling at the thought of the four of us sitting up in the grandstand with the boys cheering, with Hubbie and I not having a CLUE about what is going on. ( he is NOT a fan of football either).

But..... I am looking forward to the reminiscing ......" Mum, remember the time we went to see the footy..................." I just hope that Iron Maiden aren't still doing concerts by the time my guys are 18 ! LOL

Fuel Prices Starting to Heat Up..... $190 later.

I have posted before about my interest in Peak Oil and how it will impact fuel prices and the flow on effect for basically every product on the planet.

Yesterday I really FELT it!

When I was driving the 7.5 km to work I noticed that the fuel price at the United fuel station was $136.7 ( for the green fuel that I use) while across the road at the Coles Service Station it was $1.47. I suddenly remembered hearing on the ABC news the night before that fuel prices were meant to go to $1.50 for Easter and that fuel had hit a $108 US a barrel. I also remembered that this particular fuel station was often the last one to put up their prices.

I did a quick U -Turn and filled the car up, at the same time calling and texting everyone I thought would be interested to fill up before the price hike. I note that earlier in the week the price had already jumped 9 cents a litre.

So... I filled up my car ($70 gulp~!!) and hubbie filled up his ( $120 ~gulp gulp!!!). Sure enough, on the way home I noticed that it was $1.47. That is a TWENTY CENT LEAP IN SEVEN DAYS !!!!

At present, I budget $30 for my car and $20 for hubbies car a week ( just dropped hubbie's from $30) I can tell you that $20 at this rate is just JZZZZZTTTTTTT click ! ( meaning it takes NO time at all before you hit 20 bucks !

So..... what to do. I could walk or ride to work... but it's always about time. Hubbie walked to town today to pick up his new pushbike because he had ridden the other one into the ground, literally, the axel broke beyond repair and he already rebuilt it once. It took him one hour and 10 minutes. I just don't have that at the start and end of each day. In a couple of weeks it will be dark when I walk home and there are sections that are just road, with no houses and no street lights. I live in a little town, outside a bigger regional centre. He rode the bike home which took about 20 minutes ( he is much fitter than I am. It would probably take me 45mins)

I could ride my bike, something I would really aspire to do. Logistically this is messy. I am a professional. I wear suits. Can I scrunch the suit into a backpack ? Can I shower at work ? Can I cart make - up? Can I do my hair at work ? I know, I know. Dump the societal expectations and not wear make up and don't do your hair. Unfortunately, the clothes maketh the man in my game, or should I say, the suit, hair and make up maketh the woman in a man's world ! LOL

Hmmmmm...... thoughts anyone ? ?

The Tea Towel

As you may remember I have taken it upon myself to single handed revive the lost art of 'air pot' use http://avisionsplendid.blogspot.com/2007/09/chaning-world-one-air-pot-at-time.html

I laughed recently when a girlfriend in Sydney told me that she is single handed reviving the art of giving tea towels ! Remember when people went on holidays they brought back tea towels and spoons as gifts for people ? She cracked me up ! We decided then and there that we are not reviving spoons, just the tea towels.

I can remember receiving tea towels for my 'glory box' when I was young. The tea towels were usually brown with pictures of kangaroos on them LOL !

When I was travelling out west earlier this year I picked up two gorgeous tea towels from Inverell in brown and pink that had Australian recipes on them. I gave one to another friend for her birthday with some other bits and pieces ( after telling her our revival story). I gave the other one to my friend from Sydney when she was visiting last week. She laughed so much ! She said she loves it!!!

A few days after giving the first tea towel away my friend turned up with one from England (where she's from) saying she had brought this back with her and now she knew exactly who would appreciate it. Oh gee I laughed !

Do you remember the tea towel and spoon giving tradition ? It makes me laugh !

So, join the club, lets do a revival of the commemorative tea towel.

The Proverbs 31 Woman

Some years ago, and I can’t remember how, I stumbled across this concept of the Proverbs 31 woman. It is a verse from the bible. If you are ‘anti religious’ or simply not religious, don’t switch off just yet ! View the concept as you would any quote from Ghandi, Stephen Covey, Tony Robbins or any other personal development ‘guru’.

The basis of the verse is a mother telling her son what sort of woman he should look for in a wife. That basic idea written thousands of years ago has been the basis, particularly in America, for women to adopt a particular way of life, that is, the mother who serves her family.

I personally love the philosophy behind the ‘concept’ of the proverbs 31 woman. I will paste the full text here for those of you that are not familiar with it. Once again, I ask you to put your religious position aside and read it as a text. I have kept it in the ‘old’ language for effect and you must remember it’s about 2000 years old.

10 A virtuous woman who can find? for her price is far above rubies.
11 The heart of her husband trusteth in her, and he shall have no lack of gain.
12 She doeth him good and not evil all the days of her life.
13 She seeketh wool and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
14 She is like the merchant-ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and their task to her maidens.
16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and maketh strong her arms.
18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is profitable: her lamp goeth not out by night.
19 She layeth her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She spreadeth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household; for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22 She maketh for herself carpets of tapestry; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
24 She maketh linen garments and selleth them; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing; and she laugheth at the time to come.
26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and the law of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her, saying:
29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her works praise her in the gates.

I love this ideal. The proverbs 31 woman is loving, intelligent and entrepreneurial. When I read through each verse it gives me ideas of how to work harder at aspects of my life.

I am reminded that by doing my husband ‘good and not evil all the days of his life’ I am insuring a good marriage. I have found that over the years the more I do for him the more it is returned to me. I find it a sad part of society today that many relationships break down because of this ‘why should I do that for him, he never does that for me’ philosophy. Going out of your way to do things for your partner brings gratitude and then it turn they do something for you and the cycle continues.

When I read through this passage I am reminded of the importance of the 6P principle. When it snows I want my household clothed in scarlet – meaning that I have an emergency fund so that if something goes wrong I am prepared.

I also think…..

- I want my husband to have full confidence about the way I manage the family finances and plan for our future.
- I want to be entrepreneurial , that is, I can invest wisely and see a return on the vehicle I chose to build our family wealth.
- I want to be ‘strong for my tasks’ in that I think it is important to remain healthy and look after myself physically.
- I rise early and prepare the day for myself and my family

Of course, the verse that always gets me off the chair and into action is the one which mentions “she watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness”

I believe that society’s view of the stay at home mother is significantly shifting. It is slowly crawling out from under the grip of the feminist model that degraded the role of being “just” a mother or the idea that ‘serving your husband well’ was a form of oppressive slavery that had to be fought against!

Rather I see society as slowly shifting towards a model where even career women take off extended periods of time to ‘invest’ in the growth of their children by being the stay at home mother. There are even now ‘stay at home’ fathers !

I have been a teacher and a lawyer and a stay at home mum. I know which, by far, is the most important job that gives the best return and it’s nothing to do with money. The best return is when you make home made tortilla wraps and your six year old says ‘ the ones you make are so much better than the ones from the packet’. Joy of joys ! :>)

Reading Aloud

At the moment we are reading the Spiderwick Chronicles. The boys are really enjoying it. As I was reading to them last night I had 'a moment'. We were tucked up in our queen size bed, me in the middle. Each boy had hold of my long hair and were twisting it through their fingers. This is something that they have done since they were babies. It still amazes me that Number One son will be ten in August and he still twists my hair {(:>) joy of joys!}

As we sat reading I remembered back to my training as a school teacher. There was something called the nuerological impress method of learning to read. It's where an adult reads aloud to a child and the child tracks or follows along with their finger. There were studies at the time that showed that kids really responded to this style of learning and picked up reading quickly. They also learnt all the intonation, that is the ups and downs in your voice, or the expression.

But... you know what I reckon teaches children to read ? ......

LOVE. Snuggling them up, taking the time, immersing them in rich stories, that special togetherness that probabaly can't be studied scientifically. It's probably called 'modelling' or 'osmosis' but to me it's the love quotient. - making reading a fun, intersting, magical world of escape rather than a punishment, chore, or something you have to do so you don't get in trouble for missing your homework at school.

Teach them to LOVE it. Reading can take them on many adventures in life.

The Greatest Balancing Act

The most difficult job of all that a mother has to do is balance her roles. I often say in a funny accent "Everyone wants a piece'a me!" And often times it is true.

I work outside the home, four days a week. I have every Monday off. I really love my stay at home day. I put my apron on and bake and organise and clean and get ahead with things and it gives me a wonderful sense of peace.

I used to be a school teacher.

After my first son was born I went back two days a week in a job share and it nearly killed me. I hated having to leave him, even though I had a really good 'Day Care Mum'.

 I agonised over whether to leave or not. In 2000 I started studying again externally and fell pregnant with my second son. That was all the persuading I needed. I resigned from my teaching position and cranked up my study. I studied full time waiting for the baby to come.

My son was born in May 2001 and I juggled two little ones and the study. It was then that I learnt the value of redeeming my time. I gave up television ( except Seachange on Sunday nights on the ABC) and started to get up really early, sometimes as early as 4am, to do my study without interuption.

To cut a long story short, I had about five years at home with the children. Two years ago I was given the opportunity to work three days a week in the area that I had done my second degree in. I started the three days and eventually it turned into four days.

The boys are in school now, but not a day goes by when I don't consider coming home again. It's just the little things. Number Two son sat doing his homework this week and I thought I need to be there with him when he does it. Hubby is home with the boys when they do their homework and he is very good with them, but it's not the same. He is a great cook as well and has a meal ready when I get home. but it's not the same. The difference is , that when I get home from a busy day I have very little left to 'give'. I would be happy just to lock myself in a room for an hour until I 'come down'.

So... it's the great balancing act. I enjoy my work. I like the stimulation. However, the stay at home mum is the most important job in the world in my books! It's not about the money. We have survived before on very little money. Sometimes we do better on a tighter budget because I manage it so much better - last time I budgetted really strictly when my first son was born, we ended up being able to carpet the house with the surplus !

So, if I don't need the money and I agonise over the stay at home role, I bet you are asking why do I stay ?

The answer is complicated. I really like my work and I am grateful for the opportunity to be getting the experience. I don't want to walk away and live with the regret of what I could have acheived. I also think that I can invest as much money as I can for the future of my boys. Goodness knows what it will cost to put them through university if that's what they choose.

One good thing at the moment is that I can work flexible hours. My aim this year is to start early and finish early, hoping to be home at 4.30pm. That way I can still have a little down time before I slip into my apron and enjoy my children!

Are you caught in the great balancing act ? How do you juggle work and family ? Does your financial situation pin you to a job you hate ? Email me or leave a comment. I would appreciate your feedback.